Leaving The Valley

This was part of a 30 mile long run as Pardon and I trained for The Chicago Marathon in September 2018

Since driving down the winding road of Blackberry with all my stuff loaded into my car 4+ years ago, I’ve called ZAP and the Yadkin Valley my home. The ancient mountain ridges that loom over ZAP felt like they watched over me as I grew into my professional running career.

In a way, living in the valley felt safe. With limited cell reception and internet connection, news headlines could totally be missed as life continued on unchanged. The big news coming from our rural road was that a “neighbor” was growing ginseng and another lost one of his peacocks. 

Living in the valley has been secure. Through generosity from Pete, Zika, Ryan, Matt, our sponsors, and all the ZAP donors, I’ve been able to do what I always dreamed of – be a professional runner and dedicate my life to the craft of simply putting my legs in front of one another slightly faster than before.

Even when my career took a turn for the worst and I struggled through injury for years, ZAP continued to believe in me. That’s something I will forever be grateful for and indebted to. 

But while the beauty and comfort of living in this ancient valley is something special, much like the first settlers of this area, you eventually begin to wonder what exists on the other side of the peaks around you.

I’ve come to the point where sitting around the fire and being content in the valley is no longer comfortable. Metaphorically, I’ve let my mind begin to wonder what exists beyond what I can see at the bottom of the valley.

The sunsets were glorious over the ridges even if my broken shoulder wasn’t

In many ways, it’s scary. I have no idea what’s on the other side. And as I let the metaphor play out, I imagine myself 150 years ago exploring these mountains, letting curiosity and a bit of optimism draw me to picking up my campsite and moving to see what lay beyond the next ridge.

I’ve always been someone who prided myself in doing what I thought was best for me as a whole to continue to grow, even if that meant making tough decisions.

And I have come to the conclusion that leaving ZAP is the right decision.

The experiences I’ve shared with coaches and teammates are ones that I will never forget. How do you summarize in just a few words what 4.5 years training and living in a socialistic compound with professional distance runners at the bottom of a remote valley was like and how much it meant?

I ate (more importantly) learned from Chef Mike’s ability to turn any normal dish into something special. I found trails and beautiful waterfalls that aren’t on any map, we created a parody of The Shining, I learned how to 4-square to “mountain music”, I became a Co-partner in TWB Running, I biked remote roads and saw beauty that no camera could ever capture, I saw the stars like never before and had massive bonfires underneath them, I met everyday runners from all walks of life that all had inspiring stories of their own at ZAP camp, I won a World Title, but most importantly I forged lifelong friendships.

As I move on, I feel a sense of anxiety and optimism of what lays beyond, much like the first settlers of Appalachia generations ago.

While the next step isn’t as clear, there’s a sense of adventure in the many options and different paths that I can take. Plans to move out west are in the works, but nothing is for certain.

I decided to represent ZAP at the professional level in 2016 because it felt true to who I was. The mix of Pete’s belief in myself mixed with the purity of doing something that was off the beaten path was the right fit for where I was. Now, I begin the next stage of my life to once again follow my dreams and be true to who I am.

This change is brought on for many different reasons but the biggest of which comes from my eagerness to branch out. I am not able to fully dedicate to my current craft with a lingering injury. In order to cope with that loss I have developed new channels and am carrying the same energy and optimism that I carried for running into other areas of my life. I ran almost all of my PR’s while balancing other things, I believe I can do that again.

Thank you again to everyone who has supported me through this period of my life. The list could be endless as every person and teammate I’ve come into contact with has made a positive impact but some that come to mind are:

The ZAP advisory boards wisdom,  Chef Mike’s humour, Jen Pillow’s friendship, Pete’s passion, Burg’s Evenness, Zika’s perceptiveness, Lopic’s organization, Fred Fedewa’s pizza deliveries, Debby & Joe T. generosity, Joe’s ability to look at the larger picture, Pardon’s ability to tell you exactly what you need to hear, Joanna’s ability to challenge your view, Andrew’s care and loyalty for others, Melanie’s ability to help me recognize my emotions, Brandon’s ability to keep fighting, Aaron’s ability to let it roll off his shoulders, My parents love and financial support,  Josh’s belief in himself through all things, Caleb’s leadership, Tristin’s ability to make all things fun, Stephen for showing me that any hill you can ride up if you’re crazy enough, Rhoddie Bike Shop for going above and beyond, Boonshine for become the place to go and supporting us, the inspiration and encouragement from every ZAP camper, whether you know it or not you made it all special.

While I lose the title of “professional runner”, my athletic career feels far from over. I am just as committed as I was 4 years ago to making the most out of this next step.

My last run with the team before leaving

I didn’t run as fast or win as many races as I wanted to these last 5 years but, I spent everyday happy and grateful and I think that’s what really mattered.

May the next adventure be as rewarding as this one was.